A day in the life of the devil

Another one from the writing sessions :D

I walked lazily into the room. Another day, another human to catch off guard. As the door shut behind me, she turned around and a silent gasp escaped her mouth. When you've been doing the same job for centuries on end, you lose any interest in pranking these misled fools. "Who are you and what the fuck are you doing in my room?" Okay. That was new. Usually, humans prayed or ran for their leather books. How they find solace in leather only they know.
"Really? Red skin, horns longer than your arm and you don't know?"
"Are you the devil?"
Okay, that does it. I'm sick of these humans imagining there's one devil out there and that the same one always comes to them. Like what the actual fuck?! We're not that inefficient!
"I'm A devil, not THE devil. Please!"
"Whatever man just do what you gotta do and get the fuck out of my room. I'm Skyping my boyfriend and I haven't seen him since yesterday."
Why do I always get assigned to these juveniles? Human nymphs are phenomenally annoying! But I guess this will last only a little longer. Once i'm head of the assignments department, I can relax in my corner office and let the younger reds and crimsons take care of these little shits.
"What music do you listen to?"
"Hey cut the crap. I have a boyfriend. Now if you don't mind..."
She continued talking to her pink thingamajig like I didn't exist. I picked up my bag from outside the room and filled up a vial of liquid gothic and another of thrash metal. I turned around and wafted the fumes from both onto her before disapparating back home. I'd meet her again tomorrow, oh sorry, in 5 human years.

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